Serenity

One of the challenges I face as a rider is knowing when to ride and school dressage and when not to.   I've learned to listen to my horses on this.  There are days when my mares tell me in no uncertain terms that they just want to be left alone to eat their dinner.  Although my mare Elena de la Vega (2004, golden bay Friesian/Warmblood cross pictured in my profile photo), usually comes to me from her pasture, there are days when her nostril curls or her eyes harden when the saddle comes out.  Of course it's important to practice regularly to continue to build her strength and mine, but some days it's just not worth it. 

I had one of these days recently.  I ignored subtle Elena's signals and tacked her up anyway and led her into the arena.  It was empty and dusty.  After walking to warm up and a little trot, I realized even I didn't want to be there.  So we rode out of the arena and around the barn instead.  It was a gorgeous day and almost instantly, Elena's eye softened and her step livened.  It was a bit windy and sometimes she can be a litle spooky on such days, but although she looked about her with alertness, she refrained from allowing her fears to get the best of her.  She asked me several times if I was alert enough and each time I assured her that I was looking out for her, that nothing would harm her and I was in charge.  If you knew my mare, you'd understand why I find this so encouraging.  She is by nature a dominant mare and since day one (at only a year and half) she has challenged me and doubted my authority.  It's so gratifying that she is finally coming to accept my leadership and follow my example!  And so, we had a good ride just walking and trotting a little around the proprty, enjoying the beautiful day and appreciating the break from the monotony of the arena. 

Dressage riders (and sometimes their horses too!) often need to be reminded to bring a little variety into their work.  Cross-training by trotting over poles or jumping, going for trail rides, or riding up and down hills are all helpful for the development of the dressage horse.  Riding outside or in new places tests the horse's trust of her rider and helps prepare them for shows or other situations.  Thank you, Elena, for pointing me in the right direction!  I'm all too aware that winter is approaching and our days to ride outside in comfort are numbered.  She was right to ask me if we could go out instead.

I also had a day recently where I was not up for riding.  It was nothing physically wrong with me but emotionally.  Riding and training dressage requires a great of patience since it can take many repititions to make noticable progress.  Days when I sense my patience at a low ebb or my irritation level easily triggered I try to take notice and not ride or at least not school in the arena.  It would be too easy for me to lose my temper at myself or my horse and that would be counterproductive.  Since Elena is particularly opinionated and dominant, she does not always back down from a fight and things could escalate.  And my other mare, Kaleidoscope (1995, refined golden chestnut Holsteiner/TB) is submissive but prone to fear and over-reaction.  The last thing I would want to do would be to undermine their trust in me as a calm, confident, and competant leader.  So sometimes I go to the barn and just take them out to graze in the sun and just reflect on how blessed I am to have 2 such stunning creatures who trust me to take care of them. 

It all comes down to the serenity prayer - knowing when to accept the things you can't change, to strive to change for the better the things you can, and the wisdom to know when to push on and when to let go.  Horses have really helped to restore balance to my life.  I can get caught up in my dreams and ambitions, what I don't yet have or have not yet accomplished, but they remind me to be thankful for what I already have and am blessed with.  I can also get stuck on when things have gone wrong, when loss has stuck my life and my heart, and there again my animals and my God remind me that there is still hope and love and grace for me.  So I am humbled and thankful for the reminder. 

Interconnectedness and flourishing

I have always wanted to make a difference in the world, to leave my mark, to make the lives of those around me better for having had me in it. I believe the same is true of our horseback riding, that our foremost goal should be to improve the horse(s) we ride.  I'm certainly not the first to assert this, but it's such a worthy aim than it's completely worth being reminded about - and as often as needed!

In the art of dressage, our primary aspiration is to sculpt the horse.  To teach her to use her body with better balance and more lightness and collection and expression.  In so doing, we also scupt our own bodies because we have to use our bodies well in order to teach our horses to do the same.  Since horses and riders are living creatures, this is a lengthy process with much repetition and attention to detail. 

I recently came across a line in Caitlin Brennen's novel "Song of Unmaking" about how horses that are worked often and well have a kind, soft eye.  It's so true!  And not just about horses!  All living creatures need to live out their purpose and to connect with other beings in mutually beneficial ways.  People as well as other animals thrive when they fulfill their passions and sparks, when they live in accordance with their natural inclinations.  Horses and other animals have always inspired me by their simplicity.  They want what they want (that grass on the other side of the fence, that squirrel up that tree, to snuggle close when thunder strikes...) and they live completely in the moment.  Humans, on the other hand, so often confuse their wants and desires and impose standards, expectations, and limitations on themselves.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not suggesting we all give up civilization and go wild again.  But we can learn from animals about the immense value in being true to ourselves. 

We can also learn from them about the importance of positive connections with others.  As the bible says "God says, ' It's not good for the Man to be alone.' (Genesis 2:18)"  All living beings thrive when they are in connection with the world around them.  Increasingly, our modern world is pulling people away from the connections we need in order to flourish.  There is so much perceieved isolation and disconnectedness.  I believe this is in part because as a culture we have forgotten our need for interconnectedness - with God, with nature, with animals and other people.  And although I love the sense of connectedness I get from the vast social networking world and online forums, there's just no replacement for in person connection.  We all need to feel others' presence, to interact with them, to let ourselves go enough to truly empathize with others.  It's in letting our own worries and insecurities go that our ego gets lost in the vast interconnectedness of the world and that we find our true selves.  And it's in finding ourselves that we can truly lead others towards finding themselves, that we can do our part to help the people and animals around us to fulfill their potential and live their dreams.